


Fanatic

by CR0SSDRESS



Category: Berserk (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Dark, Multi, Obsession, Obsessive Behavior, Possessive Behavior, Reader Harm, Reader-Insert, Yandere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-27 00:00:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20938946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CR0SSDRESS/pseuds/CR0SSDRESS
Summary: [Reader-insert] Every time you looked his way, and saw either that helmet on his head, or the smile on his face, you could feel yourself choking up, thinking that the smile wasn't for you to begin with, that he was throwing himself into meaningless battle for nothing.





	Fanatic

**Author's Note:**

> Made to be gender-neutral reader x Guts.

It was too much.

The demon armor threatened to eat away the very fibers of Guts's soul, yet he wouldn't depart from it for the sake of the others. He defended a band of misfits, you included. Every time you think about it, you think of just how weak you are, how much you're holding Guts back in a world where holding back isn't something you can do if you want to survive, how had you not existed he would be free to take that armor off at any point in time now. Every time you looked his way, and saw either that helmet on his head, or the smile on his face, you could feel yourself choking up, thinking that the smile wasn't for you to begin with, that he was throwing himself into meaningless battle for nothing. 

The others didn't feel that way because they weren't nearly as defenseless as you were. They were knights raised in a royal background, a fairy who could lift himself out of danger, and a witch who, while defenseless while casting her spells, in a way, was very powerful on her own, as well as two skilled soldiers from the most notorious renegade known to man. And then there was yourself, a lone peasant raised in an awkward background.

Being there during the sacrifice just merely by snooping on the Band of the Falcon, being swallowed by the eclipse, everything from that point on happened by sheer luck. You weren't supposed to be alive by any means. You were there, you watched the sea of people be destroyed at will by these monsters, that hand in the sky...those mysterious people. Then waking up to be by their sides, and though Guts was confused by your presence, he...he took you in. From then on you felt like nothing but a liability, a thorn in his side. Casca was enough trouble as she was because she was a child now, unable to fight in the throngs of the war surrounding the three of you constantly. The brand of sacrifice was on your neck served as a reminder of the war.

The least your presence brought was comfort to Casca because you took care of her, as it was borderline public knowledge that she was terrified of Guts. When you look at guts, you see a battered man who has lost everything, but chooses to keep going. He's a heroic man, brave, scarred from battle. He was absolutely beautiful for this situation you all were in, this everlasting war between humanity and the supernatural. Now that there were four more additions to the party, it just felt out of place to be the only one who couldn't lift a weapon and accurately defend themselves, other than Casca (but let's be real, if she tried to pick one up, she'd be used to it again immediately). Everyone in this party has their views on peasants. The knights Farnese and Serpico ignored them. Guts had no opinion on them, Casca sought to indirectly protect them, Puck didn't exactly care about humans as a whole as long as they treated others well, and Schierke helped them because her grandmother opted to help them. Even then, if it was this way where no one was bothered by the presence of a peasant, it still felt better to leave, leave without any note. That was the plan for tonight. You planned on leaving, tonight.

You gathered your bearings and tried not to make any noise in the process.

A small broadsword, a loaf of bread, a change of clothes and a small, carved wooden bowl. You wrapped these up carefully in the leather patch on the ground before you, and wrapped them up. You tied the newly-formed leather sack with string from your clothing and held it, placed it down, then grabbed the fashioned leather holster made for your sword by Serpico off of the nearby tree-stump that it rested on. It sheathed perfectly on your back. You took a deep breath: it was nothing but darkness from here, on. How you wished you were already far, far away, in an abandoned house, trying to make use of what you limited yourself to. 

slish!

You jolted and looked around the eerie setting. It was mainly darkness with patches of illumination gifted by the moonlight in this thicket. The fire that burned for the sake of food was already extinguished. Everyone slept together in the large camp, and no one felt you moving around or leaving the tent. It was a perfect chance for ambushing.

You spotted Casca poking her head out of the tent. You backed away to try and escape her peripheral view, knowing just what was going to happen whenever she finally spotted you. "uuu~!" She pointed at you and stood, then began to walk toward you. "No, no Casca, shh—" your brows furrowed as you stepped over to try and quiet her down, but she was already making happy noises. This was less than ideal. Someone was going to spot you eventually!

"Casca—“

"[Y/N]." Guts spoke your name from behind you. You turned around to see the male standing there, in the very same demonic black armor that scared you, and you started to wring your hands at all of the possibilities of what would happen next. "You weren't thinking about leaving, were you?" He asked, and you couldn't bring yourself to answer the glaringly obvious question. "[Y/N]."

"You spent very long in the forest." You answer in an aggressive manner, to stop him from saying your name, so painfully like that. You look up at him with a frown on your face. Guts's expression is blank at first, before the corners of his lips bend down...just a bit, surprisingly. "Here." He held out his hand. "Come with me. I want to talk to you."

Ah yes, personal time.

You couldn't remember a time you'd been alone with Guts. 

All he was capable of doing to you now was scaring you, now that he owned that armor. You often thought about how he could turn on the party at any point in time if he felt like it, and no one would be able to properly defend themselves because of just how strong he was. For this reason, you hesitated, and didn't dare lift your hand to meet his.

He noticed the hesitation in you and rubbed the back of his neck, before approaching you straight-forward. You looked up at him with your lips pursed, feeling so unsure about all of this. But without much thinking, you put your hand in his, and you trusted him, seeing that smug grin of his spread across his face. The worst that could happen in this situation is that he kills you, and you no longer feared death after coming face-to-face with it, all times being because of Guts. Every time you saw him, you kept that in mind. As he starts walking, he asks.

"Why?"

You look at him.

"Why what?"

He looks back at you.

"Why are you trying to leave? Leave us...leave me?"

You let out a sigh. Here, you knew Guts was expecting the entire truth, but you didn't want to bring yourself to talk to him about it. "First of all, don't play that bullshit card with me. Second of all...well..." your voice fades in the distance. There was no more hiding behind people interrupting you because of incoming enemies, or because you weren't speaking loud enough. It was just you and him, as he stared into you...it was time to tell him everything.

So you did, you poured your heart out to him, from everything of wanting to leave to thinking it would be easier to keep your distance. At this point, Guts was stopped in his tracks as he listened to you. Everything he heard, everything that you gave him as the reason why you were leaving, gave him a mixed response, you could tell when you looked at him. "I...I think I should go." You tell him and tighten your grip on the leather sack lying against your back.

"[Y/N]—“

Your fight-or-flight system kicked in, you ran, ran as fast as you could, exerting as much pressure as you possibly could on your legs in hope that they took you far, far away. The forest screamed around you, the leaves roared in the wind, and gave them more of a demonic sound than the apparitions spawning around you, following you. "Leave! Leave me alone!" You yell at them furiously, as if that would do any good. They couldn't respond to you otherwise they'd be mocking you for trying to disperse them with your mouth, and you'd look even more like a fool.

You felt humiliated even if nothing was said. The image of Guts standing there with his hand outstretched toward your running body brought burning tears in your eyes that vanished off of your face into the night.

You should've stayed. Staying would've felt much better, listening, watching, experiencing Guts's emotions back there would be better than listening to the wail of these ghosts around you, crying to you, looking for a suitable host body to use. At any rate, this would've been the best time to kiss the world goodbye and experience the waves of death wash over you...but you were so much better than that. If I just keep running, someone will come along and rescue me. A possibility that may require running for your life until dawn showed itself (cue Run Boy Run ofc), a task you hadn't done since childhood. You trusted your body with everything you could, you found something to believe in: your feet, running in these impossible boots. 

"Give us...giiive usss..."

"!?" Your leg felt cold, your body felt rooted. You dragged on your body, an attempt to break out of the temporary entanglement. You look down and spot what you thought was your doom, a ghastly specter, grabbing your right leg with all of its might. "Giiive..." 

its howls threatened you. You felt compelled to listen, to give yourself to all of these specters. What you felt while running was far different than what you were experiencing at the moment, the hands of your enemies threatening to nearly rip you apart and consume your soul. It was a matter of life or death right now. In that moment, it felt like time slowed down so that you could process your situation. "Oh HELL no!" You spout, unsheathing the sword you once took great effort to retrieve with both of your hands. With the adrenaline in your veins practically soaring in you, you raise the great-sword high, and bring it down onto your enemy, slicing through the specter like it's nothing.

No time to look at it, it's time to keep going again, especially whenever your fight-or-flight system was still active.

You quickly sheathed your weapon and resumed running for your life. That must've been how most people from the Band of the Falcon felt? They use their fight-or-flight system to escape situations like that? If that was the case, once you made it to the house you needed to train yourself to get stronger, because there wasn't time to linger on the past. Going back to Guts was not an option, being "useless" like that was no longer an option. 

"Hello? Hello, does anyone still live here?!" 

it was a village. No horses in sight, which kind of worried you, but you were desperate to encounter someone else that wasn't possessed by a demon or belonged to Guts' traveling party. "I need help!" You called worriedly, your aching, burning legs coming to a slow stop. After all, it'd been hours of nonstop running, stopping almost didn't even feel like an option. But you needed to stop...you were severely dehydrated, and you couldn't even feel your lower body except for the severe ache in your calves. "Anyone?! Anybody!?"

A voice reached out. "Hold, I'm coming!" It tells you, and you felt right to believe in these feet of yours, to keep the trek long. But not everything in this world was given to someone unless they asked for divine help, whereas you'd done no such thing, and were admittedly a little wary to the concept that this person, whoever called out to you, may not even be real at all. You however were glued to the spot that you were standing in, and you were absolutely worn out, in both the arms, the legs, the feet, and the mental. Seriously, it was hard to get through that. It was only a few hours ago that you decided to split apart from Guts, but...in a way...you already missed him.

Around the corner of the seemingly-abandoned home appeared a woman who looked to be the same age as you, and you couldn't have been happier. Tears stung your bloodshot eyes, but you couldn't bear to close them when a gift from the earth appeared before you in such a desperate time. "Thank...thank you, so much," you whisper as your body lifts itself unconsciously, and you feel yourself stumbling at the woman.

"Are you alright?...hey, hey—" her arms, though small, caught your body and elevated it. Your head rested against her shoulder as you deliriously stare at the horizon, your world becoming blurrier, blurrier, gone. Her unattached voice tried to rouse you yet again, but it was too late. You were completely blacked out and no longer able to hear her voice.

Dreams weren't things you could have and it came as no surprise when you didn't get one. You woke up, your eyes flashing open before hooding themselves as they adjusted. The world was dark save for a single candle looking to illuminate what it could while rooted in place. The ceiling was brown, wood, so you were in a home. "..?" You make noise of concern as you raise yourself up. "Are you sure you can sit up?" The female asks, and you look over at her in shock. The realization that you lived through the night without the comforting embrace of the party to go off and live on your own brought a large smile to your weak face, and you threw yourself onto the girl. "Hey, hey!" The woman chuckled and pulled herself back, grabbing you by the arms gently and pulling you back so that she could clearly see your face, which, as of the moment, was pooling with more bloodshot tears. 

"I just can't thank you enough...it's...rough, with the war out there. I've been marked with the brand of sacrifice so I'm always being chased by demons," you explain to her. "I used to be part of a traveling party, but I abandoned it after a lot of thought. I want to be able to fend for myself." 

The woman listened with great intrigue. After all, people don't magically appear out of thin air like you did. "You were very tired, that's for sure. You collapsed as soon as you leaned against the watchtower, and I’m glad that I found you.” She told you, and a weak smile spread on your face. You then held your hand out. “I’m [Y/N], former peasant,” you say casually, and she laughs. “My name is [N], former farmer. This place was invaded multiple times by different races, animals, demons, humans, you name it. At first we were capable of fending them off...for awhile, before submitting to disease that was spread. I was very fortunate. My family hid me deeper into the forest and provided me with food from another village, because they wanted me to live.” She started to frown however, “but my parents did not live very long. They succumbed to the disease that washed over our village—possibly the plague—as did the villages around us as of the moment. I successfully managed to pillage a lot of food though, and I’ve made this place my home again, because it was the house I was born in. I’m a little lonely at times, but...” she trailed off. You sat up and placed your hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay,” you told her, “you don’t have to relive that moment.”

She smiled wistfully. “Thank you. ...but what about you? I know you said you’re tired of being useless, but where did you come from to say that?” 

It was a good question. You were seen mulling over your thoughts with a simple gesture of your finger to your lips and your eyes cast on the ceiling. But then you got it, and you looked over at her. “I...come from what is left of the real Band of the Falcon, not the army you see these days ... those men are not men, they are demons.” you muttered. “Raid-commander Guts and Lieutenant Casca. They are nothing like they used to be. Guts...he fought so hard to make sure that the both of us were safe and out of harm’s way...I felt as if it was the most important thing to be alive at the time because I had little-to-no worth, as all I was doing was helping Casca because, once we emerged out of the danger, she forgot everything she knew.” You explained and looked over at her. Her face was lit up with expected shock. “You followin’ me?”

”Mhm.” She nodded intently.

”So anyway, that was what my role became. While Rickert and his cousin took care of her, Guts and I would hunt. I was never good with a sword and could barely lift one up.” you grimaced, “so every time I went with him I felt like a sack of meat and bones that took up space. I could help him carry what he killed if he wanted to take it back home, that was about it. But he and I ... we built this relationship together. I became close to him as about as close as he was to Casca. We never showed it to each other, but the feeling of comfort was there. For a moment, I could even tell you that I fell in love with him, but I knew better because I know my place—a peasant—and that’s all I’ll ever be. I kept these feelings for the longest time.” You looked down at your feet, now planted on the ground. "Expressing them would've been a big mistake. Besides, my feelings of being useless overpowered the feeling of love, and he had Casca...dammit, I wanted him to look at me the way he looked at her..." you balled your hands into fists and swallowed thickly, "but that life wasn't for me. I couldn't possibly be the lover of someone who was always put in peril because of stupid mistakes. He should definitely have someone who's as strong as Casca by his side, or Farnesse...every woman we've come across has looked at him as if he was the love of their life." You chuckled. "At first, I hated him. I didn't want to be part of that, but I had no choice. But I don't want to keep talking about that. I've got to get moving—"

"Stay."

You were shocked when you heard those words and looked at the woman with the same expression. But she had a smile on her face, surprisingly. She took your hand into hers and gently squeezed it. "No, there's no need for all of that." She declared. "I'm looking for a companion. Like I said, things get lonely at night. You can't run for the rest of your life." She smiled. "Uh..." you trailed off. You definitely had to think about it. "You should sleep." You tell her then, looking at the door. "I'll go on a little walk to think things through. I don't want to bother you."

"Of course." She stood, and you did as well. The two of you switched spots, and you placed your sack down in the chair she sat in. "I'll be back. See? I put my belongings here so that I have a reason to come back." You joked, and the two of you shared a laugh. "Of course." She said with a sigh, then smiled again. "I'll see you again soon."

Fresh air. 

The night felt good on your face even if it harbored the most terrible darkness. Demons, demons everywhere. They ruled the night and day here. How you wanted nothing more to destroy every last one of them so that you could live in peace, with yourself at the very least. It felt more like these specters were just...hollow reminders of your past, a peasant who stole, meddled, and stuck your nose in places that you never should've ventured around. The specters were nothing, you only needed courage to best those demons. But those that were...larger, namely demon soldiers from the Band of the Falcon, things that you'd have to face head on in the future if you were...

...no, you weren't going back to them, even if you wanted to. You swallowed thickly and shoved that image out of your mind. "I will not go back." You say to the air with some confidence. "I will never face h—"

silence.

Something was stirring in the wind, and it wasn't that familiar wind that fell over on the earth. You looked over at the corner of the wooden house with pursed lips. It was already too late, they were most definitely alerted to your presence when you spoke out loud. 

You unsheathed your sword. It wasn't just yourself that you were defending, you were also defending the woman in the house. Fighting was with purpose.

"[Y/N]."

Your resilience falters, your hands shake suddenly, your unsheathed sword falls from your hands and stabs into the ground. It was like the wind itself spoke your name. You looked around in obvious confusion...but there he was.

That black armor. That blank expression, that streak of white hair, the closed eye. You felt your knees buckling into place.

"You didn't go very far." He pointed out.

"I-I couldn't," you stammered, "I passed out from running all night."

"You were always pretty fragile." He spoke as he took a step further, "you tried so hard and couldn't quite get it." and you took a step back. "Why? Why are you here?" You ask him with furrowed brows. "I'm always aware of where you're at, [Y/N]. I know it may not seem like much...I have so many repressed feelings." Guts looked at the ground, before looking at you and the increasing space between the two of you. "Like...how I feel about that woman helping you. She's asleep right now, isn't she?" He asked blankly.

You paled. "..."

"I see." Guts responded. His hand pressed against the door. "You're good about that, making connections with others," he chuckled a bit, "sadly. It makes this harder for me. Now...I don't have to kill her if you come with me, willingly. We can't be apart again, I feel like I'm losing my mind already." He said, his tone obviously shifted. He sounded more hollow. ...you felt mortified more than happy about his sudden approach. "No." You answer immediately, your own hand reaching toward the door. Guts' hand slammed down on yours, and his grip began to tighten on it. You grit your teeth and looked up at him angrily. "Guts! Let go!" You gasped at him, furrowing your brows. "She doesn't need to be involved in this. I'll come back, okay? Just let me get my belongings."

Guts' hand let go of yours. Your hand clenched and unclenched itself, and it throbbed, and it hurt. You were mortified that he'd even do such a thing to you. "You're complying? Good, I'll be waiting out here then. Don't keep me too long." He warned. You didn't even bother to look at him, but you couldn't bring yourself to walk through that door and face your new companion, only to tell her that you could no longer be with her because you were found out. She probably had no idea of how dangerous Guts is, and she probably didn't even know who he was. You grit your teeth and stared at your feet. 

"Are you going to go in there or are you going to come with me?"

You couldn't even bring yourself to speak, but out of impulse you spun around to face him. Your hand raised and slapped his cheek, gritting your teeth. "Why? Why are you doing this?!" You asked him (most likely a little louder than intended). "I made my own decision! You want to act as if you love me now...I know that's not it." You shoved your hands against your sides. "You just don't want your harem to escape, is that it? You don't want me, you just want the number." You scoffed. "We both know who you truly love here. Go back to her, and leave me alone!"

Guts laughed, to your astonishment. You swallowed thickly before gritting your teeth again and making another hasty decision, slamming the door shut in his face and storming away from it, hurrying over to [N]. "Hey, hey." You shook her shoulder.

"...?" She sat up, rubbing her head. "What's wrong?" She asked, "is there something happening out there?"

"I have to go." You told her as you grabbed your sack off the table. 

"Wait, what?" Things obviously clicked in her mind. She looked at you just as seriously as you looked at her. Your lips were pursed tightly and you felt absolutely jaded already. "...is it really that much of a problem?" She asked, but you were already walking toward the door. As much as you wanted to stay with your new companion, Guts was...different right now. "Maybe we can try explaining to him that—" "There's no explaining anything to him." You intercepted. "I have to go, [N], please."

No. No, she wouldn't accept this. "I'm not letting him chase you away from me, [Y/N]. You need to let me talk to him." She spoke and grabbed your hand. You swallowed thickly as she reached the door before you, and pulled the door out. Her hair shone in the moonlight, and in that moment, while you stood behind her, you have never valued someone's life more than your own. Knowing what was going to happen to her, you felt choked. You couldn't bring yourself to move and intercept what was about to happen. You could only call her name in your weak voice, and drop to your knees. [N] was greeted by Guts' "warming" smile, and turned to see what was the matter with you, wondering why you were calling her name like that. If only you'd known that this was going to happen.

"[N]! [N], [N] [N]!! [N]!!!" You screamed her name, trying your best to scramble to your feet. Guts stood over her decapitated body. His hands held her head before him, before one hand reached inside his cape and removed a vial from it. Your eyes were too blurry to look at what he was doing, or what was inside the vial. "Nooo..." you sobbed helplessly, curling up into a little ball on the ground.

Was this it? This was it.

You were cornered like a wild animal. Your sword was on the ground, you didn't even think to pick it up. Even if sparring against Guts seemed to be legitimately impossible, you would've tried for [N]'s sake. [N]. She didn't deserve to be dragged through this like she was. Now her body was on the ground, blood pooling her body and touching your trembling fingers. 

"Stop your crying." Guts kicked [N]'s body out of the way as he spoke, and he closed the door behind him. "There's a few things we need to do before we leave this house."

"N-n-no. I-I want nothing t-to do wi-with you." You glowered at him, wiping your tears out of your eyes and lifting yourself up. "I-I'm going t-to kill you. Right here...right now," 

Guts smirked. "Hit me all you'd like, you wouldn't be doing any favors. Come here, [Y/N]. Willingly. I don't want to have to hurt you." He told you.

You spat at his feet. At first, his expression was still the same, eerily blank, but then his lips began to contort into that of a psychotic grin. It all happened so fast. Your body tried to react by turning you around, but Guts was already against your body, pressed against yours, gloved hands gripping your face tightly, all of your features feeling smushed together. You stared into his face with fear. "L-let me g—"

"We've skipped formalities, [Y/N]. Your gesture showed me that we don't have to act like lovers, we have to act like soldiers! And what do soldiers do? They get rough. We're going to get rough here," He spoke, as your hands went up to his hands on your face to try and pry him off of you. It was simply no good—Guts was too strong of a warrior, too strong of a man. ...he was no longer a man. He was a savage. The real Guts would try to...at least try to keep it civil. You were staring into the face of an animal.

"You see, [Y/N], us humans are savages. We are simplistic, but we have desires." The knife glints in the moonlight, the ropes hang around his arm. "Desires take over simplistic minds, and when we have these desires, we decide to push it to the limit because we want this desire, no matter the cost. Our humanity? It means nothing to us if we've achieved our desire. Reputation? It means nothing." He slits his wrist and holds it over the vial, looking over at your horrified face. "In this example, I'm going to prove my love for you by making a love potion for you, because I desire you, and I'm going to have you, no matter the cost. ...Schierke didn't know what the hell I was doing. I told her I wanted this vial for someone special. She provided me with few ingredients, but I overheard her speaking with Farnese, and finessed the ingredients needed to make this love potion," he explained.

You were bound to this chair. Wordless. Expressionless. When you looked at this man, you were numb. "I told you I have repressed feelings." He went on to talk again. "I never told you once just how much I loved to stare at you, did I? How I wanted to feel your skin against mine, how I wanted to kill everyone around us and run away with you. How I wanted to throw everything away just so I could be with you, peacefully. And I'm so much closer to having it...all I need..."

He holds up the knife.

"The blood of someone I hate...that girl's."

That wasn't too long ago. [N]'s decapitated head, that surprised expression on her face bore itself into your mind. You looked over at it, in the corner. Guts perched it to face you.

"My blood...and your blood."

You whipped your head around to face him. He walked up to you calmly. "This won't hurt too much." He spoke. "Now, I didn't believe in magic at first, but Schierke is a true witch, and she's a strong one, at that. So I asked her to enchant this for me under the guise that I was using this and gathering materials for Casca's memories." He purred at you.

You grimaced. "You're si—AHH!" You hissed. The knife was driven into your skin and dragged down, across your wrist, ignoring your agonizing cries as he drew the blood. He brought the vial underneath your arm and collected some of the blood that spilled and brought it to his lips. "Now, all we have to do is drink it, drink it together, and we'll be together forever~"

He drank some of the mixture and coughed for a moment, then looked down at you. Your face was frozen with horror and you couldn't bring yourself to look away from him. He brought your head back and squeezed your cheeks, keeping your mouth open. You tried squirming, tried closing your mouth, tried anything. Nothing worked. The mixture went into your mouth and down your throat, and you were forced to swallow everything. 

Down your throat.

Your body twitched and your head hung low. 

Your mind is not your own.

You looked around, before your head was pressed against Guts's body. You squeezed your eyes shut and took a deep breath, before looking up at Guts.

"You love me now, don't you?" He asked gleefully.

"I...love you..." you said weakly. In the corner, just barely out of view, you witnessed the horror of Guts's love. [N]. [N]...

You squeezed your eyes shut. This was what it was now? This was all it was ever going to be. Guts lifted your body up and pressed yours against his again, but lifted you just enough to have your head barely poke above his. He pressed his lips against yours and closed his eyes, running his hands down your sides and holding you up by your thighs. You helplessly wrapped your arms around his neck to stay afloat. He pulled away and looked up into your tearful eyes, "I'm so in love with you [Y/N], you wouldn't believe it. I want to show my love for you, ok?" He asked and stroked down your cheek with the back of his hand. You nodded at him, "show me," you say, and he starts walking.

Why? Where?

He stepped out of the door while watching your head, and you were greeted with sunshine, sunshine everywhere, sickening sunshine. He looked up at you. 

"What do you think? We'll run off together, you and I." he smirked. You nodded, closing your eyes. "Yes, Guts. Take me away Guts, take me away."

"I love you so much."

Guts begins his walking. At this point, you could only hope that wherever he took you was somewhere you could escape, and your eyes remained closed as you clung to him. "I think you're much cuter like this, where you're dependent on me." He stroked your back gently. "We won't have to go back to that life again. It can be just you and me, okay? Everything will be okay as long as you're with me. I'll protect you—Schierke and the others can protect Casca, we can go off on our own, okay? You just have to tell me you love me and everything that's happened before will disappear. Because I love you, [Y/N], we have our entire lives ahead of us. Please, open your eyes."

It was useless to resist him, so you did open your eyes to your own horror. He was holding you over a cliff. Half of you begged for him to do it, but you weren't going to. You looked at him with fear. "You call this 'love'?!" You gasped at him, squirming. "You're going to kill me! I'm going to die! I knew better than to ever join this band—I should've just went to Griffith!" You shouted. "You're a MONSTER!"

"...monster?"

There was that familiar stare again. This wasn't going to be good. Guts was becoming unpredictable. He was consumed by his own desire to have you in his arms, and now that he had what he desired, he was becoming rather reckless with it. He had your life in his hands right now, you could feel your body dangling, followed by a feeling of weightlessness. He couldn't possibly be thinking... "No...don't do it!" You beg him with teary eyes. "Anything but this, Guts. I'll love you like you want me to. Just...just...please..!" You squeezed your eyes shut.

"You can beg me like this but you can't love me like this?" Guts asked rather glumly. You felt your spine trying to jump out of your body. He was lowering you down off of the cliff, lower and lower, being greeted with the brown color of dirt. "How can I expect this to be real love if you're scared of me, huh?" He frowned at you. "I can't have that...so you either love me or I'll kill you. That's the only way I can get your real emotions out of you."

"Yes...y-yes, I will love you, I love you from the bottom of my heart," you spoke, teary eyed, gripping his hands tightly. "Please don't do this to me. I-I'm going to die!" You squealed.

"Oh, but you won't die." He purred to you as he pulled you up—you now dangled by your feet above the 50ft drop. "But you never quite noticed the detail I left for you. ...do you know where we are, [Y/N]?"

Do you dare answer the question?

"...n-no." You swallowed.

"Look around you."

The camp. It burned. All of your party members...dead, gone, like the wind. Who knows how long they suffered in agonizing pain for? It was so useless. Fighting against him was useless. You stared into his eyes, and found nothing but twisted love. That potion...it must've only been for show, and that you were forced to drink his blood, to be a part of him.

"Don't leave me again."


End file.
